如果PHP是用英式英语编写的

PHP 之父Rasmus Lerdorf 在创造出PHP时，他并没有用格陵兰语或者丹麦语编写(尽管他有格陵兰和丹麦血统)，这是非常明智的。虽然对他来说用英语编写，并没有用自己母语编写来得容易。由于他以前在加拿大待过，所以他选择了本地方言。不是法语，也不是不合纯正英语标准的方言，我们通常称其为“美式英语”。

从那以后，英国的PHP开发人员就对这件事情格外不满。Rasmus 在想什么?更重要的是，我们要如何改变这个既成的事实?我们开发人员如何保证即使在数字时代，大英帝国的优良传统也能继续发扬光大?

一记耳光

1. 		<span style="margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; border-top-style: none; border-right-style: none; border-bottom-style: none; border-left-style: none; border-width: initial; border-color: initial; color: black; background-color: inherit; "><span style="margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; border-top-style: none; border-right-style: none; border-bottom-style: none; border-left-style: none; border-width: initial; border-color: initial; color: black; background-color: inherit; ">$variable_name </span></span>

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最有必要更改就是要删除一些深受美国人喜欢的符号，并用一些更加精炼的符号代替，让PHP变得更加优雅。

1. 		<span style="margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; border-top-style: none; border-right-style: none; border-bottom-style: none; border-left-style: none; border-width: initial; border-color: initial; color: black; background-color: inherit; "><span style="margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; border-top-style: none; border-right-style: none; border-bottom-style: none; border-left-style: none; border-width: initial; border-color: initial; color: black; background-color: inherit; ">£variable_name </span></span>

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开始吧

1. 		<span style="margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; border-top-style: none; border-right-style: none; border-bottom-style: none; border-left-style: none; border-width: initial; border-color: initial; color: black; background-color: inherit; "><span class="tag" style="margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 10px; margin-left: 0px; padding-top: 7px; padding-right: 0px; padding-bottom: 4px; padding-left: 0px; border-top-style: none; border-right-style: none; border-bottom-style: none; border-left-style: none; border-width: initial; border-color: initial; color: rgb(0, 102, 153); background-color: inherit; width: 635px; line-height: 18px; font-weight: bold; "></span><span class="tag-name" style="margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; border-top-style: none; border-right-style: none; border-bottom-style: none; border-left-style: none; border-width: initial; border-color: initial; color: rgb(0, 102, 153); background-color: inherit; font-weight: bold; ">php</span><span style="margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; border-top-style: none; border-right-style: none; border-bottom-style: none; border-left-style: none; border-width: initial; border-color: initial; color: black; background-color: inherit; "> </span></span>

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2. echo 'Hello World!';  
3. ?> 

今天的英国程序员中，有多少人一开始接触到的就是“Hello World”这个典型的美国式程序，虽然简单但老套粗俗令人反感?一份更加冠冕正式的介绍将会促进大部分年轻的英国天才使用这种语言，从而为更广阔的用户群提供更加文雅的气氛。

1. 		<span style="margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; border-top-style: none; border-right-style: none; border-bottom-style: none; border-left-style: none; border-width: initial; border-color: initial; color: black; background-color: inherit; "><span class="tag" style="margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 10px; margin-left: 0px; padding-top: 7px; padding-right: 0px; padding-bottom: 4px; padding-left: 0px; border-top-style: none; border-right-style: none; border-bottom-style: none; border-left-style: none; border-width: initial; border-color: initial; color: rgb(0, 102, 153); background-color: inherit; width: 635px; line-height: 18px; font-weight: bold; "></span><span class="tag-name" style="margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; border-top-style: none; border-right-style: none; border-bottom-style: none; border-left-style: none; border-width: initial; border-color: initial; color: rgb(0, 102, 153); background-color: inherit; font-weight: bold; ">php</span><span style="margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; border-top-style: none; border-right-style: none; border-bottom-style: none; border-left-style: none; border-width: initial; border-color: initial; color: black; background-color: inherit; "> </span></span>

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2. announce 'Good morrow, fellow subjects of the Crown.';  
3. ?> 

缩写词

没有东西比没必要的缩写词更加让英国人痛恨的。“缩写词”在伦敦的街道上闻所未闻，正如土生土长的英国文法家不肯自降身份去发送“c u soon traffic kthxbye”等各种信息，宁愿使用一些看起来更加文雅的词句代替：“亲爱的先生或女士。只要时间允许，我希望在一个小时之内，尽快到达。我向各位保证，你们的马匹会得到妥善安置。敬上。”(输入较慢，是的，但是不至于仓促)。

从另一方面来说，PHP里面包含很多毫无必要的缩写字和缩写字首字母。

1. 		<span style="margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; border-top-style: none; border-right-style: none; border-bottom-style: none; border-left-style: none; border-width: initial; border-color: initial; color: black; background-color: inherit; "><span style="margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; border-top-style: none; border-right-style: none; border-bottom-style: none; border-left-style: none; border-width: initial; border-color: initial; color: black; background-color: inherit; ">str_replace()  </span></span>

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2. is_int()  
3. var_dump()  
4. preg_match()  
5. json_encode()  
6. mysql_connect() 

应该改成下面这样：

1. 		<span style="margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; border-top-style: none; border-right-style: none; border-bottom-style: none; border-left-style: none; border-width: initial; border-color: initial; color: black; background-color: inherit; "><span style="margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; border-top-style: none; border-right-style: none; border-bottom-style: none; border-left-style: none; border-width: initial; border-color: initial; color: black; background-color: inherit; ">string_replace()  </span></span>

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2. is_integer()  
3. variable_dump()  
4. perl_regular_expression_match()  
5. javascript_object_notation_encode()  
6. my_structured_query_language_connect() 

校正：我已经更正了“preg_match”的扩充——感谢指出来的朋友。

口才

1. 		<span style="margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; border-top-style: none; border-right-style: none; border-bottom-style: none; border-left-style: none; border-width: initial; border-color: initial; color: black; background-color: inherit; "><span class="keyword" style="margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; border-top-style: none; border-right-style: none; border-bottom-style: none; border-left-style: none; border-width: initial; border-color: initial; color: rgb(0, 102, 153); background-color: inherit; font-weight: bold; ">if</span><span style="margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; border-top-style: none; border-right-style: none; border-bottom-style: none; border-left-style: none; border-width: initial; border-color: initial; color: black; background-color: inherit; "> (</span><span class="vars" style="margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; border-top-style: none; border-right-style: none; border-bottom-style: none; border-left-style: none; border-width: initial; border-color: initial; color: rgb(221, 0, 0); background-color: inherit; ">$condition</span><span style="margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; border-top-style: none; border-right-style: none; border-bottom-style: none; border-left-style: none; border-width: initial; border-color: initial; color: black; background-color: inherit; ">) {  </span></span>

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2.     // Code here  
3. } else {  
4.     // Code here  
5. } 

莎士比亚可不愿意看到他的母语被扭曲成这个怪物。简练在适当的场合很受欢迎——在一些偏僻的地方未必如此——但不是这里。“if … else”模块是PHP之中用得最多的条件代码，所以它在使用时必须是尽可能的安全无害。有很多选择可以取代，但是这个条件语句也许是最稳健的。

1. 		<span style="margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; border-top-style: none; border-right-style: none; border-bottom-style: none; border-left-style: none; border-width: initial; border-color: initial; color: black; background-color: inherit; "><span style="margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; border-top-style: none; border-right-style: none; border-bottom-style: none; border-left-style: none; border-width: initial; border-color: initial; color: black; background-color: inherit; ">perchance (£condition) {  </span></span>

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2.     // Code here  
3. } otherwise {  
4.     // Code here