function my_isset($array, $key){
    foreach($array as $k => $v) {
        if (strpos($k, '?') == -1) {
            if ($k == $key) {
                return true;
            }
        } else {
            $pattern = str_replace('?', '.+', $k);
            $pattern = str_replace('/', '\/', $pattern);
            if (preg_match('/'. $pattern . '/', $key)) {
                return true;
            }
        }
    }
    return false;
}

$a = [
    'aa' => 'dddd',
    'xx/?' => 'dd',
];

var_dump(my_isset($a, 'aa'), my_isset($a, 'xx/dddd'), my_isset($a, 'xxx'));

根据你的业务逻辑来说，只需要判断key是否在name里面即可，即name/是否在name/fruits中能找到:
strpos($name , substr($key , 0 , -1))